Friday, December 25, 2009

I cover you brother

Merry Kiss Kiss!!! I ran through Walmart shouting this to everyone when Daddy and I went shopping for Mommy's Kiss Kiss present. It was something my mommy taught me. She kept insisting I tell the rude people who were walking on MY sidewalk that instead of what I was telling them. Which was: Everybody Move! I haven't had a lot of luck lately getting people to do what I want. I love our church, I really do, I mean just ask my mom and dad how much I beg them to go... but sometimes it's a bit bizarre. (Let the record show I said "weird" but mommy typed bizarre... I mean I'm not yet three y'all.) So when everyone got down on the ground at a prayer meeting I started shouting: Everybody! Get. Up! And they didn't. I mean I love saying Amen y'all, but I don't like all these jokes about snakes at church. They are jokes right?

Speaking of snakes I chopped one up the other day. Mom kept calling it a "worm" and it was very mushy. I tried to add it to the mud-pie I was making daddy. He needs protein after all. Poor daddy, he's always muttering that he's going to make a break for it and get hot wings. I told him I wouldn't tell mommy as long as he brought me back some. Back to my mud-pie. It is fabulous. Where have they been all my life? The 'rents sure are going to rue the day they taught me how to make those! For some reason mom started to freak when I tried to make some final adjustments to my pie while I was in my pretty Kiss Kiss dress. (Oh and note to parents: don't lure me out of bed for a surprise if it's a dress. Surprises are chocolate. Or cars. Mmm... chocolate cars!) I love pretty dresses as much as the next girl, but what harm is a little mud I say? All I know is her face contorted and there was no sound coming out of her yet her mouth was moving. Kind of like when baby brother gets really, really mad.

Speaking of brother I have been promoted to assistant diaper changer. I love this job. But, um, I reserve the right to say NO when it is a smelly one. I'm the quickest draw in the South with the wipes as well. The other day brother and I were watching Toy Story with the moms when the mean kid Sid started torturing the toys. Babies just shouldn't see that so I covered his eyes up. I learned it from daddy. He always covers up my eyes when we watch kung fu movies. I figure I'm ready for my next promotion: assistant baby protector. (And in case you are worried, no I am not still up but mom sometimes schedules her posts. At least I better not be up, ahem, Pa Pa.)

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