Thursday, August 12, 2010

Don't talk to the baby!

For all you annoying parents out there who insist on giving your opinion to someone else on how to raise their kids, I now offer you a new way to do it! Courtesy the obnoxious lady at the park (who I would totally name if I knew her name... OK, maybe I wouldn't but only because my mother taught me that you never know when the person you're making fun of will like end up saving your life or something and so if you gossip about them it should be anonymously. ... she is probably thinking: I never said that! And she's right, but that was my version of it.)
You see baby CJ was in the sandbox, his favorite place in the world, well, almost- his high-chair is the number one spot. When he was packing away sand like no tomorrow. Now when I say he eats sand. I don't mean a dab here and a dab there. I literally mean he shovels handfuls upon handfuls into his mouth and swallows immediately. I try, Lord I try, to keep it out of his mouth but it is almost futile. And I tried putting him somewhere else but he is happiest in the sandbox. And I'm usually tired by then. So I clear away all the rocks and sticks and let him have at it. Every now and then I clear out his mouth but I'm quite certain he gets a good fourth cup of sand. So he was sitting there, putting sand in his mouth, and I was exceptionally tired this day. I was gazing off into oblivion when a mom came up and said, screamed almost: "he's eating sand!" I blinked. She had this look of horror on her face. Was pointing. I expected to see blood gushing out of him or something. Instead my baby boy looked up at me and grinned. Like, "mmm, mom, it's the chocolate-sundae kind of sand today!" I shrugged. "Oh. Yeah. He eats sand." Then, and this the obnoxious parenting tip in case all the rambling made you forget the point of this post, she directed her next comment to him. The baby. "Oh, that's bad for your teeth!" I glared up at her. I imagined dark things and realized it was best to get the heck out of the park lest I attack some stranger with a sandbox toy and wind up on the news.
You may not even agree with me. You may agree with teeth lady. How about this? Engage an adult in a conversation instead of stooping to talk to their children. I could have just as easily said to her bratty son who came running up so fast he almost kicked sand in my baby's face: "my aren't you rude, maybe your mommy should teach you manners!" But that would be rude.
I know I'm normally light and fluffy on my posts so let me end with this. Parenting is hard enough without attacking each other all the time. I've been trying to learn the flip side of this, as I usually am the one biting my tongue off to not say something to other parents. I get annoyed when I am sitting there playing with my kids in the sandbox and suddenly I am surrounded by a gaggle of children while the other parents are lounging off to the side. Truth is, they are likely exhausted and perhaps when my baby is older I too will spend more time staring off into oblivion wondering who I am and how I got to the park?


  1. We haven't had that with our little lady yet, but someone did that with our dog. We had just adopted Bumblebee a few weeks earlier and were struggling with overcoming her anxiety issues as well as obedience training. We were in the park, working on obedience training, and this woman came up to us. Bumblebee was terrified of her. Instead of taking a hint she kept forcing herself on Bumblebee, trying to feed her (we said no to that). Finally she told our dog "You really need obedience training." I wanted to tell her she did too, but I didn't.


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